After reading “To Hell with Good Intentions” by Ivan Illich, in which he criticized and generalized American volunteers as being wealthy students who “pretentiously impos[e] [them]selves on Mexicans” and do more harm than good, I felt a wave of guilt. I am an American student going to another country, albeit my home country. Am I imposing myself and my ideals, values, and morals? Will my presence in the community create disorder as Illich stated it would? I hope not!

One of the main reasons I chose to work with the Bulgarian Food Bank (BFB) this summer was because I am Bulgarian and want to help the community I grew up in. I speak the language fluently and understand the culture and traditions, countering one of Illich’s arguments that American volunteers “pretend to serve” a country in which they can not communicate with or understand those they are helping. Yet at the same time, I am also American and have a perspective on things that some Bulgarians may not have, therefore I may not be accepted as easily as I expect to be. Another criticism Illich had against American volunteers was that they impose themselves on a community and try to help them fix an issue that they themselves may not see as an issue. In the case of Loewenstern Fellows, however, these research projects were proposed by the community, therefore indicating their personal needs not the other way around.

Regardless of the infrastructure set up by the program to ensure that the needs of the community are met, Illich’s disdain may point to the interactions he has had with individual volunteers. For this reason, I think it is important that while I am abroad, I am aware of the fact that I am in a sense an outsider and need to respect the Bulgarian community. I need to make sure not to impose my views and beliefs, or diminish theirs. It is important to use my skills and be open minded so I can help the BFB as much as I can and be a useful, contributing member of the research group.